Tuesday, August 16, 2011

How Are the Dogs Doing?

People keep asking me, "How are you doing?" I don't have a good answer for that. The truth is that I'm doing OK considering this is only the start of the third week without Bob. But OK doesn't mean I feel anyway near normal. It just means I'm coping and getting the important things accomplished.

Grief has stages, so I may be doing OK today but maybe not so OK tomorrow? What do people want to hear when they ask that question of a new widow?

I'm probably way over analysing that question, so let's chance the subject and talk about how the dogs are doing.

Glory, the 60 pound almost 15 year old lab mix:



Glory used to sleep next to Bob's side of the bed. Since Bob's death she's been sleeping under the kitchen table or under a table in the living room.

The week before Bob died, we though we were going to lose Glory. She wouldn't eat and couldn't walk without help. Bob said the last sad goodby to her before I took her to the vet who diagnosed a urinary tract infection and 25% kidney function.

It only took two days of antibiotics and Glory was back on her feet, hungry and feeling as peppy as an almost fifteen year old lab can feel. It was so wonderful to be able to bring Bob's dog back to him for his final days. She's on a special diet for her kidney function now. Still, I suspect she won't be with me much longer.

Sunny, the 15 pound very mixed breed with advanced osteoarthritis of her spine:


Sunny has been sleeping under the bed instead of in the bed where she used to cuddle up next to Bob. She does occasionally cuddle up next to me at night and when I sit with the laptop. I can tell she misses Bob.

Pappy, the 15 pound very old Papillon rescued nine years ago:



Pappy has always been a needy dog, full of love and wanting to be with his people. He used to sleep on the pillow above my head and follow me around all day to be close whenever I would sit or recline.

Now he sleeps cuddled up next to me, which is a comfort and a blessing. He still follows me around all day and gets very nervous when I leave home. Sometimes he whines at me to settle down and snuggle with him when I am home.

I've read about dogs with separation anxiety, but never experienced it first hand. Dogs have personalities and smart dogs, like all three of mine, know when something is not right. Pappy is the least secure because of his history and sensitive personality.

I'm giving him lots of love and attention whenever possible. He's old, he had a difficult life before he came here to live, and we both need each other right now.

12 comments:

  1. I pray that God will give you peace beyond measure. The little dogs seem so smart. Animals have great senses. They are very loving too. I am glad you have all three. We are always here to listen whenever you need to talk with whatever you want to post. I love reading your blog. Hugs from Snowbird in the Deep South!

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  2. I think people ask that question because they don't know what else to say. It's their way of saying they care. However, I can imagine you get kind of tired of it. How comforting to have the dogs around! They certainly do feel the loss, but I know will help you tremendously through the grieving process. It is a process and there will be ups and downs - one step forward, two steps back for a while. But God is good! He cares for you and so do we!

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  3. I've never lost a spouse but I have lost a parent at a young age. I've learned that ppl grieve in different ways, some days are better than others. Some weeks are better than others. You can be doing really well and then a scent or a thought or a comment will remind you of something and bring you right back down. The best you can do is put one foot in front of the other. Death is hardest on those left behind. and while it's a pain to hear, at least ppl are asking. It's there way of showing they are thinking of you but have NO idea what to say.

    Enough said of that. Hugs those puppies and knit a little bit each day.

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  4. Give each of the dogs a hug and pat from me, and hugs to you.

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  5. Dogs do seem to grieve. They are so attached to their people (and their doggy pack) that they have to notice when their family has changed. I'm so glad that Glory was able to be there for Bob. And I'm very glad that the dogs are comforting you now. I'm thinking about you a lot and I hope you know how many people care about you.

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  6. Anonymous6:06 AM

    I am so sorry for your loss. Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. Glory, Sunny and Pappy will be a great source of warmth and companionship for you.....papiokc

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  7. M,

    I am so glad you are not alone. The pack will cope in stages I suspect. I hope you are eating and sleeping okay M??? are you?

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  8. Linda W.7:14 PM

    I lost my husband two years ago. One Two days before his death, I had to have our fourteen year old german shorthair put to sleep. Time does help, but they are truly missed.

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  9. I have not been keeping up with blogs well lately, so sorry to read about your loss. Our furry companions do help with the grieving process, glad you are surrounded by such good company. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

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  10. Anonymous3:38 PM

    Even though I have thought of you every day and wanted to ask, I haven't because I know you are not "OK". It will take time, both for you and the dogs. My hope is that your family and pets are a comfort in your time of sorrow.

    My little dog also had kidney problems the last 2 years of his life. He was put on a special prescription diet too. Hug all of them for me!

    Take care!

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  11. Love to you and to the dogs, every day.

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  12. Thinking of you and the puppy's. Hugs to all.

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